“Bill (Hybels) writes, ” a newly promoted colonel … had moved into a recently built makeshift office during the Gulf War. He had just arrived and was just getting things organized when out of the corner of his eyes, he saw a private coming his way, carrying a tool box.
Wanting to seem important , he quickly spun around and picked up his phone. “Yes,General Schwarzkopf, yes, yes, of course, I think that’s an excellent plan,” he said. “You’ve got my support on it. Thanks for checking with me. Let’s touch base again soon, Norm. Goodbye”. And he briskly hung up and turned around
“and what can I do for you?” he asked the private.
“Ahh, I’m just here to hook up your phone.”
excerpt from John Maxwell’s – “The 5 levels of leadership”
Who would want to be busted like that colonel was?
I believe there is something truly satisfying when we can just be who we are, warts and all. There is something freeing about being transparent. When you are, you develop trust. People who interact with you know who they are dealing with, someone who has integrity and is authentic. When we are who we are all the time and not acting in different ways to different people, we make people feel comfortable with us. I’m not talking about being a bit more sensitive when you are in different situations, or with different people. I think there is wisdom in doing so.
I’m talking about not trying to impress anyone in any situation trying to be someone we are not.
Seriously, why put on a front of trying to be someone you are not? It is stressful to always be on your guard keeping up the image of two (or more) different actors…and for what? How good can you feel about yourself if you are having to act the part of someone else in a given situation because being you is not good enough? Let me encourage you to not live any secret lives (or roles).
Are there any circumstances you find yourself in where you are going along to please others? Are there any situations where you are not speaking up because it might stir up some potential conflict? Are there any opportunities you should be stepping up, but you’re not? Are there any individuals you are trying to impress by being someone you really are not? You might find some immediate benefit in the short run taking on this secret role, but int the long-term, there is the strong potential of many deep regrets. Its not worth it!
Be who you are and strive to be the best version of you.